Death and Grieving are two serious topics which should be clearly explained
as the average Westerner doesn't fully comprehend the purpose of death and
grieving. These two topics can - and constantly do - cause so many problems
for many; and they shouldn't. Understanding death is very important as when
the “body” dies that's certainly not the end of things; in fact,
it's the beginning.
Death in this world is birth into the next. Birth and Death are the same
things. Let me elaborate here; when a baby is “born” and the umbilical cord
is cut, the baby actually “dies” from being part of it's mother and thus
experiences death from it’s mother as well as birth into the new world.
Death is something which frightens people only because they fear the unknown
and think that death is painful. Fact: Death itself it totally painless;
whereas dying may not be.
To help you understand further, let's go through the actual
process of what happens when someone is dying and actually dies; to what
we can term a normal death. We are going to use a Christian in this example
as it's the most popular religion for the Western person - so you will find
it easier to follow.
A person who is nearing the very point of death will start to feel a numb
sensation creeping upwards from their feet to their knees, slowly getting
higher. The light fades as if a cloud had passed across the face of the
individual, now feeling the cold numbness, the cold as of ice creeping upwards
past their hips, up to their waist. Slowly - slowly it reached up towards
their heart. They gazed about themselves with eyes which were fast going
blind, but they start to perceive shadowy figures about them. There is the
rustling of strange voices, not understandable to them yet because their
hearing is changing. Sight is like seeing through a filmy gauze veil. Slowly
the eye's will loose their physical sight and start to use their astral
sight - this explains why some people see things which to those gathered
around don't see and assume the person dying is delirious - only ignorance
is blind.
The cold now creeps up and strikes at their heart. With a last convulsive
gasp they finally start to die as their heart stopped and their lungs ceased
to pulse. Now conditions were speeded up because with the cessation of breathing
there was the termination of oxygen to the brain. The physical body now
twitches in the last nervous reactions - twitches without actually feeling
the twitches - without any pain. They are now beyond pain, beyond any feeling
in the body. At this point of actual death the “Angel of Death” will have
placed their hand on the physical body's forehead to release the spirit
within.
Also at this point they may perceive loved ones around
them; not love ones from the physical word, but from the astral world. This
is quite normal as there are very special helpers who await by the death
bed so that just as soon as the astral form starts to separate from the
dying physical body the helpers are there to give every assistance. Just
as in the same case of a birth, there are people waiting to deliver the
new-born baby; so you are never alone. Death to Earth is Birth into the
astral world, and the necessary trained attendants are there to provide
their specialized services, so there is no need for fear; there should never
be any fear of Death.
Gradually the connecting cord - the Silver Cord – thinned,
frayed, and finally parted and the Golden Bowl is shattered. The newly-coalesced
astral form hesitated a moment then gradually, with a slight jerk, started
into motion, going faster and faster into an unknown plane. Note: It
can take up to 3 earth days for the silver cord to be broken and the Golden
bowl shattered; thus completing total freedom for the astral body, and the
physical body shouldn't be cremated during this period.
If this person during their life had been a close follower of their religion
their death won’t be so straight forward. They hadn't believed in reincarnation
and for arguments sake let’s say they were a Christian. They had believed
in the resurrection of the body at the Day of Judgment. They believed that
all bodies buried or burned eventually were collected together and clothed
again with flesh; even after thousands of years. Now in the astral form
they were lost, lost and wandering, a victim to the fallacious beliefs to
which they had subscribed for so long. Perhaps they believed in nothing,
but the dead resting in their lonely graves or collected in little piles
of ashes from the crematoriums, but they knew they were alive, alive in
a different shape. About them they saw alternately black fog of nothingness,
and then when a little doubt about their religion came into their awareness
they saw another facet of their religion - angels? Desperately they fastened
on the idea of angels. Reluctantly they throw aside the thought of resurrection
- what was resurrection to them? They were alive, weren't they, albeit in
a different state? But they could see angels, couldn't they? So what was
this talk about resurrection? Let them live for the moment, they think,
and then they seemed to drop to the ground onto their feet, on their feet,
astral feet? spirit feet? yet they felt very solid!
The ground felt soft and springy and warm to bare feet. But they soon drop
to the ground and the veil was drawn aside; they look about themselves.
Angels were flying through the air, cherubim’s were sitting on clouds, great
choirs were singing with monotonous repetition. Away in the distance they
see a golden light. Away in the distance they see the Pearly Gates.
Swiftly they moved into action, running across the springy turf, inexorably
drawing nearer to the Pearly Gates. At last, after an unspecified time,
they reached those monumental edifices which towered so high above them.
A gleaming figure out side with a flashing sword of golden light barred
the way. “Who are you?” asked a voice. The being gives their name. From
just inside the gate another sparkling figure opened a great book and moistening
his thumbs with his lips, rifled through the pages. “Ah
yes” said the second
voice. “Yes, we expected you here. Enter!” The Great Book of Records was
closed. The Pearly Gates were opened, and they, now a young naked person
enters.
For some time the newly arrived visitor was in a state of ecstasy at the
realization of all that their religion had taught him. Angels, Cherubim's,
Seraphim's, etc. The Heavenly Host singing in multi-layered choirs, St.
Peter, the Recording Angel, and the Great Book of all Knowledge wherein
was kept the record of every soul upon Earth, in which was recorded the
good and the bad of every person who had ever lived. Gradually, though,
this newest visitor began to feel uneasy.
There are inconsistencies. They soon realise that this is not real, this is a pantomime, this is stage stuff. So where had they gone wrong? Was it something wrong with their religion? Then a thought came to them about resurrection? Well, they think to themselves, is this as ungenuine as resurrection? What about resurrection? How could dead bodies which had long rotted away be reassembled at the last trump of a great bugle? Where would all those people stand, how would they be clothed, how would they be fed? And this angelic host, this glimpse of Heaven is a disappointing place, “I am beginning to doubt my senses” they think. No sooner had they said that to themselves than there was a great clap - as of thunder - and the whole edifice fell around him with broken shards of the Pearly Gates and the golden light extinguished. But - stop! - a greater light came on.
The
recently diseased individual, now a visitor, looked about in awe. This was
more like it. Running towards them they see people whom they had known in
their last life on Earth, people they had loved. They see a beloved pet
coming towards them and jumping up at them and shouting with delight. Another
figure comes towards them and says, “Ah, so now you
are released from your delusions. Now you have reached a true home, the
Land of the Golden Light. Here you will sojourn for a while - while you
and you alone - decide what you want to do next”.
So it is that many religions lead one astray. So it is that one can read
of any religion and learn thereby, but the true wisdom. Once you have passed
over you should call for help and it “WILL” arrive. This is all done by
telepathy; and don't worry that here in this Earth you don't know telepathy,
as when you're in the astral plane the ability is automatically restored.
Friends will appear and help you on your way. You are “NEVER” left alone.
One of the biggest curses of modern-day life is the attitude
of the undertakers and funeral home people because they - no doubt for reasons
of commerce - try to pretend that one's “loved one” is not dead, but merely
sleeping. These undertakers paint the dead faces, they wave the dead hair,
they prop up the dead body as if simulating a person who is drowsing on
a cushion of satin. It seems to be a universal conspiracy in present
day life to conceal grief as if there is something shockingly shameful in
showing emotion at a loss.
Often grief is tinged with definite hostility, hostility
that a person has died and left one. Now, just think about that and
- irrational though it seems - it is true - there is some sort of subconscious
hostility towards a dead person. Often, too, there is a feeling of
guilt. Could we have done more for the suffering person? Could we have
in any way saved their life? Could we have eased their suffering? Well,
if a person “puts us in the wrong” we often resent that person
so when a death occurs there is much “soul-searching” - "who
is to blame?" "what more could have
been done?" or “how could they have done
this thing to me?” “how could they have gone out
of my life?”
Undertakers go to fantastic lengths to pretend that the
corpse is just a sleeping body. They falsify values, and, in Dr. Rampa’s opinion, it
is very wrong indeed to shove a body in some unnatural attitude - unnatural
for death, that is - and just pretend that he or she is just sleeping. We
should have a new concept of death. Great men like Winston Churchill
were not afraid to shed tears when the occasion warranted it. Winston Churchill;
it is said, could shed tears of emotion and tears of grief, and he was a
better man for it.
Now you ask what could be done to help a person suffering
grief through the loss of a partner or relative - let us not have any of
this hypocrisy about a loved one because often young people find a great
relief in the loss or death of an old tiresome parent. They feel ashamed of their
relief and so they rant on about “loved one”. The first thing to do is to
face that death has occurred; to face that things are now different. There
will be red tape and interfering officials who will want all sorts of papers
signed and countersigned. Heartless officials of the country will want
their own share of whatever legacy is left.
One can help a lot by listening to the person who has been bereaved, listen and let the grieving person talk, let the person talk out his or her sorrows, let him or her discuss the past. In this way guilt will be drained off, grief will be drained off and the one who has died will be freer. It is quite essential that a person be helped to get over grief, it doesn't do to let a person stay alone grieving, mourning with a hard straight face showing nothing to the outside world because such grief bottled up inside one appears somewhere. It is like a steam boiler - you can't screw down the safety valve and keep on putting on the heat - something will burst eventually.
A person who is overcome with grief which is kept bottled
up will later suffer from ulcers or severe bowel trouble, or it can even
start arthritis. In extreme cases schizophrenia can occur; these are
all medical facts.
These things happen, but they would not happen if there was more understanding
of the nature of grief, it would not happen if neighbours would help by
letting the person talk, by keeping silent themselves, except for sympathetic
noises at the appropriate times. How many times do you hear a bereaved
person say “If only I had acted differently they would
be with us today” There
are other cases where a bereaved person will rant at the dead person, ranting
on about “why did they die and leave me?” or “what
am I going to do now?”
One of the worst features of the funeral service is the
eulogy where someone speaks a whole lot of rot about the bereaved. It's amazing that no
one who has ever died is bad; it seems. People search around for someone
who can tell a whole lot of lies saying; “how good
the dead person was”
and “what a dreadful loss it will be to the community” but that is
bad, you know, it makes a bereaved person think that he or she has lost
something far, far greater than is really the case.
There are often cases where a husband loses his wife; perhaps in childbirth. The man, now a father, has undisguised hostility for the poor innocent baby who in being born quite inadvertently caused the death of the mother. So there is a father ruined and a baby ruined right at the start. If people would only clear up their “conceptions” about certain things.
Now grief - what is it? Often it is selfishness!
It is often opposition to any change. People do not like a change which
is permanent, and so when death occurs - well, that is very permanent, that
is a considerable change, and resentment and hostility occur. What
you should do is this; help a person who is bereaved by encouraging that
person to talk, and if the person weeps so much the better. In weeping
the emotions are released and there is then no risk of one's sanity. You
must talk gently, but firmly to the person, telling them to weep, telling
them not to bottle up their emotions, telling them that - yes, they have
had a terrible loss, but soon they too will be moving to the other side
of the curtain which divides the dead of this world from the living of the
next world. And if you are a good psychologist - the best psychologists
come from the homes and not from the offices of so-called professional men
- you can do a lot to help those who need your help.
I do want to mention here that, whereas people should be encouraged to give
vent to grief in order to “get it out of their system” they should not be
encouraged to persist in grief because such an action is merely grieving
for their own loss and not genuine grief; it is self-pity and such is not
to be encouraged.
As can take up to 3 earth days for the silver cord to be severed and the
Golden Bowl to be shattered - this is when the astral body is completely
released from it's dead physical body - grieving should not last more than
3 days else you create delays for the person who has recently departed.
Your grieving provides unwanted “anchors” which retard the recently departed's
progress. Read “Beyond the Tenth” page 14 second paragraph.
I fully understand that this may be very hard for some, especially when you're just lost a loved one, but you are not helping them by continuing your grieving passed 3 days. If you truly loved the departed person; stop fretting, as you will see them again in the astral world when it's your time; just be patient. You will ALWAYS see those who you truly love again!
Just remain patent until it's your time.